Last week I wore a dress to church that I could finally fit into and I was feeling pretty cute. That is, until a lady walked up and asked me if I was expecting again. Really? REALLY? Who does that? Doesn't everyone know the rule? Unless you see the water break, don't ask. And maybe not even then.
Melissa called tonight and asked if my last post was a sly way of announcing something. Something big and round and 9 months in the making. So, in case you were having the same thought, the answer is
This is my baby:
And unless God has some other plan, he will be my last baby. Even if God did have a plan, I wouldn't mind at all if he executed it in some other uterus, and then just let me know when it was time to start changing diapers. I really and truly wouldn't mind having many more children, but I am kind of not that great at the many-children thing. I love them, oh, how I love them, but dang, they're messy.
No, the changes I am talking about have been a result of the choice we have made to homeschool. At first I told myself I was not going to be one of those wack-a-doo mamas that lets homeschool take over her life. You know the ones; time line around the living room walls, bookshelves in every corner, a mini-van that vomits library books, and food that doubles as science experiments.
Well, I have the shelves and the book-puking van, but don't have the time line. Yet.
I rearranged the studio this week to accommodate the new bookshelves I bought at a rummage sale. Jonah staked out the Core Phase shelves as his own little bed.
What is Core Phase, you ask? It is where we start out. It's the basics.
It is the time when we learn:
right and wrong
good and bad
true and false
family routines and responsibilities
the value and love of work.
Those shelves will be filled with games and books and art supplies and, invisible to the naked eye, lots of one-on-one time with mama.
I am in Core Phase, too. I have to strip down my way of being with the kids.
I am learning to listen to the kids as they teach me what they are ready to learn,
which is way harder than you would think.
I am learning to relax.
Kids don't have to learn something all at once, only once.
They can learn bits and pieces of it, return to it over and over, and put the big picture all together themselves. In fact they are pretty great at it.
I am learning how to inspire.
It is super-de-duper hard, but when done gently and without demands, it is magical.
So, yes, I am changing, but I am not, and hope never again to be, preggers.
Oh, and I'm never wearing that dress again, either.